3 years ago
Sunday, November 24, 2013
Like With Glue
Bonding with someone is strange in general. With all the billions of people, that two should happen to meet and connect and want to stay connected- the odds must be staggering.
And so they bond like with glue, like skin does to skin with glue. Their actions, likes/dislikes, thoughts, feelings become more and more similar, more connected. Even though there are and should remain some differences. Like with glue, two dislike but somewhat similar things are stuck together.
But when you become bonded to someone and they begin to pull away- you get torn...or warped...or twisted...bent out of shape.... The skin, your very person, that's bonded to the other get ripped off you- like with glue.
Saturday, December 8, 2012
Is My Happiness Making Me Unhappy?
I'm not used to happiness beyond the short-term. Finding someone I'm comfortable with all the time is unsettling to me. I keep waiting for her to get tired of me and leave me. I can't decide if it's intelligence or madness that drives these worries.
But when I think of her, I smile. Even her flaws and faults, ever exaggerated in my mind.
Hmmmm, yeah. Yeah, I love her.
Saturday, October 13, 2012
Still Evolving
Life fascinates me.
Just when you reach the point where you believe it's impossible to fall lower, you do.
And when you reach the point that you give up and accept your meager existence, you find more than you could have ever hoped for.
Saturday, March 3, 2012
RIP- Davy Jones
The Monkees were always a personal favorite and I'm very saddened by the thought of no more reunions.
Friday, February 17, 2012
Monday, February 13, 2012
Hardships
Anything I have to moan about is petty, slight, and/or something I'm so used to that it no longer matters to me.
Should I get all the flashy accessories in my new vehicle and the high-end stereo system? Who cares? It's a car; it gets me from Point A to Point B.
I lost the eBay auction for the limited edition, mint-condition, double LP of Aimee Mann's "Lost In Space" only available from the UK? Well, crap / who cares? It's only a material possession.
Will things work out with the woman I've been talking to? Who cares? If it doesn't, I still have friends, family, & Fred (my 3 Fs).
WHO
CARES
?
The same cannot be said for those I know.
My best friend in WI lost her baby. She was 2 months pregnant and was very excited. And there have been complications. She's been off work for almost 2 weeks, in and out of the hospital.
I wish her the best.
An ex-friend of mine is overwhelmed by health and money woes. I can sympathize; I've been in similar situations. Although we no longer talk, I read her blog on occasion. She was a rock to me for a while, and that matters to me still.
I wish her the best.
There are others- some minor, some not.
I care.
And I wish you the best.
Should I get all the flashy accessories in my new vehicle and the high-end stereo system? Who cares? It's a car; it gets me from Point A to Point B.
I lost the eBay auction for the limited edition, mint-condition, double LP of Aimee Mann's "Lost In Space" only available from the UK? Well, crap / who cares? It's only a material possession.
Will things work out with the woman I've been talking to? Who cares? If it doesn't, I still have friends, family, & Fred (my 3 Fs).
WHO
CARES
?
The same cannot be said for those I know.
My best friend in WI lost her baby. She was 2 months pregnant and was very excited. And there have been complications. She's been off work for almost 2 weeks, in and out of the hospital.
I wish her the best.
An ex-friend of mine is overwhelmed by health and money woes. I can sympathize; I've been in similar situations. Although we no longer talk, I read her blog on occasion. She was a rock to me for a while, and that matters to me still.
I wish her the best.
There are others- some minor, some not.
I care.
And I wish you the best.
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Small Town Strange
I purchased some alcohol and a cake this morning (don't judge me). The total was $8.39 and I gave the clerk $10.50. She was completely confused and told me she had never had anyone give her change before, only whole dollars.
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Not My Best Week
I came down with something late Sunday afternoon. It hit me hard and fast. Within 2 hours of feeling "off", my throat had closed up and I had cold sweats. My neck glands began to swell. All through the night I had coughing fits which kept me awake. I called in sick to work and made an appointment at my doctor's. When I got there, she told me I was "the sickest looking person she'd seen who wasn't actually dying". They did a swab test and said I had strep. I got 2 very large, very painful antibiotic shots (into the deep muscles of each thigh) and a note that I could return to work on Thursday (with a temperature of 102.something, I was contagious).
Within hours of getting home, my legs were cramping up from the shots. There was no improvement and almost no sleep that night. On Tuesday, my throat was worse and my legs could barely move. That night- little sleep.
Wednesday morning, I made another appointment for the afternoon. My voice had gone from a general sort of "he's sick" to a Barry White low growl. As I had been sweating profusely for 4 days and been unable to replenish my fluids due to the worsening condition of my throat, I was hooked up to an IV. When my bag was empty, they switched to a bag with liquid antibiotics... which it turns out, I am HIGHLY allergic to. In less than a minute after the drip began, I was vomiting (luckily my throat so sore I has skipped lunch) and a rash and bumps began appearing over my arm, chest, and abdomen. Fortunately I was able to take my face out of the trash can long enough to hit the emergency button to call the RN.
On a side note- excessive vomiting through an already extremely raw and tender esophagus does NOT help it in any way.
The drip was halted and within moments the vomiting did too. Not soon enough though, as blood started appearing along with the stomach juices. After they made certain I was OK, a bag containing diluted benedryl was switched in. Because my system had been put through such a shock, they weren't going to try another antibiotic that day and I was given an additional day off work and an appointment first thing the next morning. I now sounded like I was using an electronic voice box to speak. I was able to hold off the drowsiness from the benedryl long enough to get home but passed out soon after. For a while. I had coughing fits that woke me up every 2 hours until 3am- at that time I couldn't fall asleep again.
Thursday morning, I was back at the doctor's by 7:30. My eyes were black from the accumulative lack of sleep. Still fevered. After Wednesday's fun, my throat and voice were gone and I could only whisper. They ran some bloodwork, consulted with an EET specialist, and announced a short time later that I did NOT have strep. Something like 15% of people are carriers of strep without actively having strep and thus, a swab test on those people will always be positive. This is why the only-for-strep antibiotics they gave me were doing nothing. In their defense, even I thought I had strep. I was given a note to be off work Friday, and they faxed over a note to my HR department for me.
I have a very aggressive bacterial infection (I can't pronounce or remember its 3-word name) in my throat. I now have 2 meds: 1 antibiotic, 1 steroid. I must take yogurt with the steroid or there's a possibility it may burn a hole through me.
12 hours after beginning to take them, my temperature is almost down to normal and the glands in my neck have shrunken. I can talk but not for long. My cough is still here, as is my sore throat, but I feel on the mend.
Finally.
Within hours of getting home, my legs were cramping up from the shots. There was no improvement and almost no sleep that night. On Tuesday, my throat was worse and my legs could barely move. That night- little sleep.
Wednesday morning, I made another appointment for the afternoon. My voice had gone from a general sort of "he's sick" to a Barry White low growl. As I had been sweating profusely for 4 days and been unable to replenish my fluids due to the worsening condition of my throat, I was hooked up to an IV. When my bag was empty, they switched to a bag with liquid antibiotics... which it turns out, I am HIGHLY allergic to. In less than a minute after the drip began, I was vomiting (luckily my throat so sore I has skipped lunch) and a rash and bumps began appearing over my arm, chest, and abdomen. Fortunately I was able to take my face out of the trash can long enough to hit the emergency button to call the RN.
On a side note- excessive vomiting through an already extremely raw and tender esophagus does NOT help it in any way.
The drip was halted and within moments the vomiting did too. Not soon enough though, as blood started appearing along with the stomach juices. After they made certain I was OK, a bag containing diluted benedryl was switched in. Because my system had been put through such a shock, they weren't going to try another antibiotic that day and I was given an additional day off work and an appointment first thing the next morning. I now sounded like I was using an electronic voice box to speak. I was able to hold off the drowsiness from the benedryl long enough to get home but passed out soon after. For a while. I had coughing fits that woke me up every 2 hours until 3am- at that time I couldn't fall asleep again.
Thursday morning, I was back at the doctor's by 7:30. My eyes were black from the accumulative lack of sleep. Still fevered. After Wednesday's fun, my throat and voice were gone and I could only whisper. They ran some bloodwork, consulted with an EET specialist, and announced a short time later that I did NOT have strep. Something like 15% of people are carriers of strep without actively having strep and thus, a swab test on those people will always be positive. This is why the only-for-strep antibiotics they gave me were doing nothing. In their defense, even I thought I had strep. I was given a note to be off work Friday, and they faxed over a note to my HR department for me.
I have a very aggressive bacterial infection (I can't pronounce or remember its 3-word name) in my throat. I now have 2 meds: 1 antibiotic, 1 steroid. I must take yogurt with the steroid or there's a possibility it may burn a hole through me.
12 hours after beginning to take them, my temperature is almost down to normal and the glands in my neck have shrunken. I can talk but not for long. My cough is still here, as is my sore throat, but I feel on the mend.
Finally.
Saturday, November 5, 2011
Oops, I Did It Again
Broke my big toe again this afternoon. I've lost count how many times it's been busted.
Actually, I've lost count how many bones I've broken all-in-all. I'm somewhere in the 30s, I think.
Actually, I've lost count how many bones I've broken all-in-all. I'm somewhere in the 30s, I think.
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