Lucid Me

I'm back.

Been insanely busy. "3 jobs- no sleep- passing out while driving" kind of busy. But things are taking shape and slowing down- down to 2 jobs (and only 1.5 weeks for 1 of those) and the remaining is a keeper (low stress, write my own ticket, and they feed me). Lost 20lbs and am keeping it off. Actively working with a realtor on a house.
Etc.


Had a dream last night. Not certain if it counts as lucid or not.

I had it all together: a home, a new car, getting along with my family, friends, loved ones back from the dead (and not in a "I'LL CHAINSAW YOUR ZOMBIE-ASS!!!" way). Everything I wanted. Even dating too, just the type of woman I long for. Everything was great. Right up until we kissed.

Then....

Then my wonderful, horrible, bastard of a mind stopped everything with my Dream-me stepping back and saying "well, this isn't real" and waking Real-me up.


I find it sad that my mind can believe all the material things in life are possible for me, even some sci-fi aspects, but love? Happiness with a woman I really want? That, to my mind, is true fantasy.