I traveled to Arizona for Christmas and stayed at my aunt's place in Cave Creek. She has 110 acres there with 5 houses on it and takes care of a 103 year-old woman- Grace Frederick (formerly Voss).
I've known Grace for 25 years. When I first met her (in her 80s), Grace was full of life and stories and humor. She was a Broadway star and literally the first woman ever broadcast on television. I recall being so in awe of her when I was a child. During more recent years, her mind began to decline. She could still remember her stories & her wit and personality were there, but she had trouble with names and faces.
I recall the last time I saw Grace. It was the night before I flew back and we were sitting around a table, talking. Grace was joking with me about my (lack of) love life. It was a bit heart-rending, but she asked my name 6 times in that conversation. When she had to leave, she took my hand and I was impressed at how strong her grip was.
Grace suffered a major stroke the Sunday after I left. Although she still had her faculties (as they were), she was moved into a hospice as her prognosis was "only a matter of days". Last Thursday night, I was online and checked my bank account and was very surprised to see a deposit- a sizable deposit. I called my parents (my mother had extended her stay in AZ after Grace's stroke and my father flown back), and they told me Grace had them put the money in. I was... stunned... to say the least- that she would think of me at all, much less in her situation. As she could not receive calls (and it was past 11pm in AZ), I wrote Grace a "get well"/ "thank you" card before I went to bed and I mailed it out Friday afternoon while doing some errands. A little before 7 Friday night, my mother called to say Grace passed away a few hours earlier- about the same time I had mailed her card.
Saturday afternoon, I excused myself from the yard sale I was hosting and called my mother and my aunt. I expressed my condolences and said a few words to my aunt about what a great woman Grace had been. After we hung up, I cried quietly in my kitchen for a moment or so- the first time I have done so for quite a while.
I have not slept since the news of her passing. Although the biological need may soon overtake, I find myself disinterested in sleep. When I close my eyes, all I can think of is Grace's hand grasping mine so firmly.
www.zebramotionarts.com/portfolio/commercial/grace.html
(Grace from 10 years ago)
7 years ago
3 comments:
You sir are an ass! Why do you need to make me all teary eyed? Grace sounded like a great woman I am very sorry for your loss. I am jealous that you were able to know someone like her!
-RHYNO
Grace was a great woman- and we are all the luckier and more fortunate for the experience of having known her.
Jeff, I am so glad to see that you posted that video of her on your blog-- I was laughing and crying watching it at work on Friday.
Grace was more than her name, it was her way of life.
Cheers, Grace! Salud!
This Thursday, if you think of it, around sunset- raise a glass of white wine to the western sky, and wish her well wherever she is.
Grace would appreciate that gesture, I know.
I am sorry. Death is so much a mystery to all of us. I thought of the Thomas Hardy poem, when I read this. It was written to his father as he was groing ill in his old age. I think it very appropriate, considering Grace “raged on” until after her 103rd birthday, but of course, death is imminent. My condolences to you. Maybe someday, you will trust someone or all of us, enough to not have to go to the kitchen and cry alone, but share in your grief. I know there’s nothing I can do, but know that my heart goes out to the survivors of Grace’s passing.
-SG
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